2011 Resolutions — How’d I Do?

Last year I posted a bunch of resolutions for 2011. None of them included watching Santa Suit and pounding my head into the wall until there was copious bloodshed.  Shame.  If I had, I'd have accomplished at least one more resolution.  Check the break for a trip to the past and some musing about my life in 2011.

Inane Chatter - Chuck 5.08 - Chuck vs. the Baby

Hey y'all, it's Shoe again! I'm battling a bit of a cold right now, but I wanted to share my thoughts about Chuck Vs the Baby. A cold's not a fun way to bring in the New Year, but this episode was a bit of fresh air after the last two weeks. If the review doesn't make much sense, I'm going to blame it on the cold...

After Shaw's cryptic reveal of a "baby", Sarah feels like she has to do this mission alone. Chuck offers Carmichael Industries as a backup for Sarah's secretive mission—pro bono of course. Morgan is trying way too hard to win back Alex while staying behind at Castle with the Awesomes. The Awesomes offer those two some romantic advice and Chuck has a "surprise" for Sarah.

So what did I think of this look into Sarah's past? Read after the jump!


mxpw vs. Frea - Chuck vs. the Santa Suit

Chuck vs. the Santa Suit
Season 5, Episode 07, original air-date 23 December, 2001

Shaw returns. Some other stuff happened, but that was the point where Frea stopped caring.

Eh, we say it all in the review. Warning, there's no optimist again. We understand that people liked the episode, yes.

We didn't.



Yes, folks, the holiday collection I've spent a few days putting together is finally here.  This is a collection of holiday stories that will have your toes tapping and your heart lightening as you read the happiness and teamwork inside.  Several wonderful authors contributed to this work, including (but not limited to): Kate McK, ulstergirl, ChuckFan56, Peter O in his fanfiction debut, HalfShellVenus, atlee, ne71, jagged1, mxpw, yours truly, and some others. You can download all three versions on the downloads page right here.

Remember to stop by and leave reviews on the stories you liked.  If you need some help with that, check out Saint Crumbylicious's Guide to Reviewing Here.

And I'm off.  May post Violet on ff.net tonight.  May not.  Happy Holidays, everybody, and remember: keep smiling.  It may hurt your face, but at least it'll freak people out!



mxpw vs. Frea - Chuck vs. the Curse

Chuck vs. the Curse
Chuck vs. the Subtlety of a Rock to the Face
Season 5, Episode 6, Original Airdate 16 Dec 2011

Chuck's a moron. The rest of the cast is pretty cool. That's your summary.

Warning: there is no optimist this week. NO OPTIMIST AT ALL.


Inane Chatter - Chuck 5.06 - Chuck vs. the Curse

Hey, y'all! It's Shoe again. I know having a new job as a graphic designer has made me a bit of a bad minion, and I have a confession to make...after I give a short synopsis of Chuck vs the Curse.

Chuck and Sarah are on the run after being framed for Decker's murder. Morgan has helped Casey escape from prison and is the only team member of Carmichael Industries not under suspicion of murder. Ellie and Awesome have a "date night" that is memorable, but puts them into harms way and Chuck makes some questionable decisions in saving them.

Find out what kind of confession I make after the jump.


Scene from a Chucksical

Greetings, again, from Frea’s captor and MBO-in-training, quistie64.

It’s been an interesting ten days or so since Frea was thrown into took up residence in my basement. She continues to try to escape, but happily I continue to reacquire her. The subcutaneous tracking chip I inserted when she fell asleep after eating that chocolate muffin works really well. I have to say, though, I’m not sure about her sense of direction. I believe to return to home she should have been traveling away from the mountains, not up them.

Anyway, it seems that her time in the basement has been beneficial to us all. She has been delighting us with a Greater Christmas story posted on her Tumblr site and she continues to write Fates. As I have said before, I’m a harsh taskmaster. I see myself as the guy that beats out the rowing speed when Charleton Heston is a slave in the galley of that Roman ship in Ben Hur. “Ramming speed!” (Wait. What? That’s a double entendre? Oh. Never mind.)

Moving on, that movie gave me an idea since Frea was a bit belligerent about co-writing the following scene with me for our musical. She refused to write one of the character’s dialogue, so I chained her to the radiator and made her watch a Richard Simmons “Sweating to the Oldies” video until she gave in. She lasted 45 seconds.

Now I give to the world a little taste of what is to come with our Chucksical. Hopefully, this will whet your appetite for what is to come and, if you haven’t already, compel you to donate to Operation Smile through our donation page.




quistie64 left me alone in the basement, so I burned a few of her blankets to send smoke signals to my brother Van, who happily scanned the article the reporter wrote when I escaped, and he sent it to me!

Thank you to [HOMETOWN PAPER] for the wonderful write-up. I'm not just saying that because they're talking about quistie and me, but they said very lovely things about the Chuck fandom, too.

You can read the article after the break.  I'll try to have a transcript up soon!

— Frea

Day Nine of Captivity

So last night, while I was having my usual nightly chat with Maximus about the state of the union and other pressing matters (is spray cheese a dangerous weapon? discuss), I noticed a little blinking red light on the old Macs I've assembled into one supercomputer capable of destroying, if not the world, at least Cleveland in quistie's basement.

Naturally, I made my appeal. And then this video began making the rounds of the internet:

Guess it wasn't the government watching me after all. Should've figured. They'd have been far more obvious about it.

- Frea


Day Eight of Captivity...Sorta

Here's what you missed or maybe you just forgot:

My name is Frea.  I'm a writer and sometimes I blog, and sometimes I tweet (but only sometimes).  I was kidnapped by quistie64, another writer and blogger and sometimes-tweeter, who is holding me for ransom.  For charity, she says.  She says that if we raise $2400 to help 10 kids find new smiles, she'll let me go.  But I highly doubt that, since she didn't let me go at $480 or at $1500.

I trained her in her evil ways a little too well, I think.


mxpw vs. Frea - Chuck vs. the Hack-Off

Chuck vs. the Hack-Off
Season 05, Episode 05, Original Air-Date 9 December, 2011
Chuck and Sarah infiltrate an unusual cult to find the designer of a computer virus. The Buy More gets a new employee.

If you pay attention to the graphic header, you’ll notice that Frea is the pessimist this week. Does this mean she hated the episode and mxpw loved it? Well, there was naked Sarah…but you might be surprised…


"Chucksical" Prep: The 12 Days of Shaw Killin'

Frea here.  Man, I'm so glad I'm stuck in quistie's basement because if I weren't, I would have gone to five or six different mattress stores today, bought a mattress, moved two beds, four bookshelves, a dresser, all of my clothes, and a bunch of bags all named "Random Bag" into my apartment and darn it all, I'd be sorer than the tail of a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.

Also, I'd probably be talking like I'm from the deep south, now that I'm thinking about.

Good thing I'm stuck in quistie's basement and didn't have to endure any of that. To celebrate the fact that it's Saturday, and to give you a little taste of what a coordinated project would be like, quistie and I put our brilliant heads together and came up with this little ditty.


Day Three of Captivitity Day One of Freedom!

Greetings, my wonderful, wonderful friends and readers. You've come together and you've rallied behind your MBO (Most Benevolent Overlord, natch), and to see such support and such love for little old me just warms my tar-black soul from the inside out. It's like the opposite of a Microwave of Love.

Wonderful news: I've escaped! I'm writing this from a cyber cafe somewhere in Colorado, looking desperately for a way back to St. Louis. How did it happen?


Day Two of Captivity

So it's me again. Frea. Your former Most Benevolent Overlord. I say former because...well, here's what you missed or maybe you just forgot:

On Tuesday, I was abducted from my home by a ragtag crew of ragamuffins with the faces of cherubs and the souls of sarcasm and song. Turns out that these wayward kidnappers could only belong to quistie64, Chuck's very own Seamstress of Songs. Dear readers, I was dragged across state lines (making this federal, for those of you who watch crime procedurals, which means Castle and Beckett aren't coming to rescue me) and thrown--THROWN I say--into a very comfortable, well-heated, and well-stocked with Dr Pepper miserable-looking basement.

But quistie is benevolent. For donations to Zachary Levi's favorite charity, Operation Smile, she'd let me go and we could write something together to prove our awesomeness. I cheered up at this. $480 to Free Frea. Not too bad.


Day One of Captivity

Was it only just yesterday that seven not-quite-adult-shaped humans snatched me from the street on the way to my car while I was deciding whether this was a Blondie or a Bon Jovi day? Feels like more. They shoved me into the back of a van, where I was forced to amuse myself with Angry Birds on my iPhone as we traveled across Missouri and Kansas and all of those other boring states in between. I tell you, it was truly terrifying. And it feels like a million years ago.

You wanna know why?


Wep and Crystal: Glee Review - Hold On To Sixteen

Hold On To Sixteen
Season 3, Episode 08, Original air-date December 6, 2011

In an attempt to recruit a few more members, Finn tracks down former teammate Sam Evans (Chord Overstreet) and convinces him to come back to the glee club. Tina comes to the defense of Harry and encourages him to pursue his dream while McKinley prepares to host the big sectionals performance.

Hey, look who popped out of nowhere to give their take on a show that is equally out of nowhere (at least on Castle Inanity)! Crystal here, rising from the dead to give you guys a blog post on what the lovely Wep and I thought about tonight's Sectionals episode of Glee. (Actually, Frea's the one who noticed us going off on Twitter about it and asked if we'd like to channel our thoughts to CI. And everyone knows that no one can say no to Frea.) Fair warning, though...if you hold a large amount of love for this show, you may not find our ramblings amusing. For everyone else, though, enjoy our take on the chaos that has become Glee, right after the break!

Frea, Captive

Greetings, readers of Castle Inanity. Quistie here. Yes, the quistie. Don’t worry, I’m not going to sing. I have paid actors for that. They work for barbie dolls and toy TARDISes.

Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that Frea is okay, but currently locked in my basement. Yes, that’s right. Locked in my basement. I’ve decided that I don’t want to wait so long for Fates updates, so I’ve taken it upon myself to take away all distractions and make her write sixteen hours a day. I was able to get access to this blog by trading login information for a can of Dr Pepper and some Swedish Fish.

I’m not sure how effective my keeping her in the basement will be, especially with the recently installed 55” TV. Oh, and the dogs really like her. …Hold on, I think I just heard gleeful shouts about Fringe Blu Rays. I’ll be back after some beatings I deal with this.

Okay, back. Be that as it may that my basement may not be the best place to keep the MBO, I do want to be a charitable and benevolent overlord (an overlord in training, if you will) so I have graciously struck a deal with my captive. Since I have an awesome, award-winning author currently secured in my basement, she must write something awesome for charity. She does drive a hard bargain, and since I am trying to be charitable myself, she talked me into writing something with her. But this must be something awesome, so what is more awesome than Chuck and Sarah singing? Together? To a silly plot? Nothing. (Although some small “special guests” might appear in this story as well.)

So here’s the deal. You have to help get Frea out of my basement. You need to do two things. First, you must vote here in our poll which musical we will “Chuckify.” Second, you need to go to my page over at Operation Smile and donate money to a worthy cause (in any amount you see fit, even if it’s just a dollar. We love dollars!). We will write a chapter of whatever musical you chose for every $50 of accumulated donations. For the cost of only two smiles, you will receive a full story. If we receive more than our set goal, you will get some “extras.” Trust me, you’ll want that, so donate and tell your friends.

Once the goal has been met and because I am charitable, I’ll let Frea go. I’m afraid it will be a long walk back to St. Louis.

Castle Review - 4.10 - Cuffed

When Castle and Beckett wake up in bed, handcuffed together, in a locked room with no memory of how they got there, they must piece together the mystery of where they are and why, all while trying to escape. But as the two of them adjust to being shackled together, what's the biggest threat they face...the people who abducted them or each other? Meanwhile, Ryan, Esposito and Gates are left to investigate their disappearance in a case where all is not what it seems.

It's The Hangover meets Saw in this week's Castle, as the show returns after a week off with a strong episode. Read on after the jump to see why I liked this episode.


Life, the Universe, and Frea

Hello, everybody!

So, this isn't a post to review a show or offer a new ebook or even pictures, which is what I usually do on this blog.  No writing advice to be found anywhere.  I think I'll just talk about life instead. There's lots of updates to be had, actually, and I realize that the people who follow me on Twitter hear a lot more than the regular blog followers.  So some of my Twitter followers know a lot of what I'm going to blog about already, but that's okay. There's some new stuff buried in here.

Hit the break for more.


The Plan is Working: A Little of Chapter 52

I see that my captive, Frea, has found a way to get on the internet piecing together those old Macs we have stored in the basement. As I am a benevolent sort, and because she keeps rearranging the furniture down there when she gets bored, I’ll let her keep her link to the outside world.

I’m happy to report that my plan to make Frea write Fates seems to be working. When I went downstairs to bring her breakfast (and mop up the remains of a small fire she lit to keep herself warm), she delivered to me two pages of Chapter 52 of Fates. I didn’t think it was really necessary that she crumple the papers and hurl them at me, but whatever. I have painstakingly transcribed the pages for you here.

Now, one thing before you read. I know I promised to let her go once we received $480 in donations to Operation Smile. However, you all are so wonderful and generous we hit and surpassed that goal with ease. Unfortunately for Frea, I am also rather capricious and promptly changed the amount to get her out of my basement to $1,500. So keep donating to Operation Smile because as it stands right now, you have already bought six smiles. You are all awesome! Also, keep voting for the musical you want us to “Chuckify.” And finally, I owe her a chocolate muffin.