Frea, Captive

Greetings, readers of Castle Inanity. Quistie here. Yes, the quistie. Don’t worry, I’m not going to sing. I have paid actors for that. They work for barbie dolls and toy TARDISes.

Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that Frea is okay, but currently locked in my basement. Yes, that’s right. Locked in my basement. I’ve decided that I don’t want to wait so long for Fates updates, so I’ve taken it upon myself to take away all distractions and make her write sixteen hours a day. I was able to get access to this blog by trading login information for a can of Dr Pepper and some Swedish Fish.

I’m not sure how effective my keeping her in the basement will be, especially with the recently installed 55” TV. Oh, and the dogs really like her. …Hold on, I think I just heard gleeful shouts about Fringe Blu Rays. I’ll be back after some beatings I deal with this.

Okay, back. Be that as it may that my basement may not be the best place to keep the MBO, I do want to be a charitable and benevolent overlord (an overlord in training, if you will) so I have graciously struck a deal with my captive. Since I have an awesome, award-winning author currently secured in my basement, she must write something awesome for charity. She does drive a hard bargain, and since I am trying to be charitable myself, she talked me into writing something with her. But this must be something awesome, so what is more awesome than Chuck and Sarah singing? Together? To a silly plot? Nothing. (Although some small “special guests” might appear in this story as well.)

So here’s the deal. You have to help get Frea out of my basement. You need to do two things. First, you must vote here in our poll which musical we will “Chuckify.” Second, you need to go to my page over at Operation Smile and donate money to a worthy cause (in any amount you see fit, even if it’s just a dollar. We love dollars!). We will write a chapter of whatever musical you chose for every $50 of accumulated donations. For the cost of only two smiles, you will receive a full story. If we receive more than our set goal, you will get some “extras.” Trust me, you’ll want that, so donate and tell your friends.

Once the goal has been met and because I am charitable, I’ll let Frea go. I’m afraid it will be a long walk back to St. Louis.


  1. wait so if her being kidnapped means more fates gets written whats the incentive again ;D

  2. Speedhoven6.12.11

    If PayPal works, I'm in!


  3. Awesome! I hope it does, and thank you!!!

  4. I just checked: Operation Smile DOES accept PayPal. Which is great news. You can choose to donate anonymously or be listed on our donor page.

  5. Henry6.12.11

    You two are crazy! The good side of crazy, but still... Anyway, who am I to talk? :)
    I have just one question: The donations are only for the Chucksical? What shall we give for a new chapter of Fates? Chocolate, Dr. Pepper...? And in case, wich kind of chocolate? Hazelnut, dark, orange, red pepper...?

  6. Donations are for the Chucksical only. New Fates chapters are completely free. :) Sending me chocolate makes me happy but I can't actually accept personal gain from writing fanfiction. My moral code forbids it.

    However, I like presents. Like, say, Cadbury Alpenmilch chocolate bars, Swedish Fish, Dr Pepper, and mashed potatoes. If you feel so inclined to gift me things (not all together, that would be gross) out of the goodness of your heart, I promise a heartfelt thank you. :)

  7. Henry6.12.11

    There is a thin line between present and bribery, and I don't want to compromise your moral code.
    So I preferred to donate like ten chocolate equivalents, just to be safe...
    (I don't know the current rate of the Swedish fish now, but I'm planning a trip to Norway next spring, I will ask...)

  8. Thank you, Henry, for your donation! You're awesome.

  9. It's so amazing that the both of you are doing this. Saw that it was already over $600 and I just had to get in on this big. Chuck has amazing fans on all ends, it's so great.

  10. michael667.12.11

    As of this writing, $1435.

    Is there another charity we can give to that will get Frea to finish up Fates? :) And will you house her while she wries? I'd offer my basement but Jeffster is using it for rehearsals. They are either practiving or I have a serious cat problem.

  11. Speedhoven7.12.11

    Just emptied my account, unfortunately that's not very much. Do you have any idea how long the donation will run? I'll be able to scrape up some more in the coming weeks.


    PS. Still haven't actually had time to properly read what's this about, other than we'll be getting a Quistie/Frea chucksical(?). I seriosly need some time off...

  12. michael667.12.11

    Get writing! $1,623.34

    3PM on 7/12

  13. The donation will remain open. We're not sure if there's a cap to how much we'll write as of right now (but I know if we hit $2,000, we're going to tackle a short called "Chuck More With Feeling" and we WILL be getting the mustard out), so all I can say is that both quistie and myself are completely grateful, humbled, and in awe of this fandom. The show may be over soon, but the generosity and goodwill live on forever.

  14. Crumby7.12.11

    "Chuck More With Feeling"?! Awesomesauce!

  15. Henry8.12.11

    Damn, Frea, now I have another something in my eye...


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