It took forever and a day to get Wepdiggy to agree to do an interview for "The Scoop." First, we ran into issues with our agents: my agent started some fisticuffs with his publicity manager outside of Nobu last weekend and we're still dealing with the fallout from that, and then I didn't have the interview room perfectly set up for Wep (the Fiji water wasn't cold enough, the Cubans were actually Zamimbian, and I forgot to pick out all of the blue M&Ms from the bowl), and then, of course, there was the issue of dueling temperaments. I'm a hothead, but I'm nowhere near as bad as Wepdiggy. He threw a fit--A FIT, I tell you--when I mentioned that Daleks were just so cute with their little earlights and their wee little hands.
But all joking aside, I have nothing but the utmost respect for this man, mostly because I NEVER know what I'm going to get next with him, and I love being surprised. So getting to sit down and chat about his writing (which, for the record, I adore), and life, the universe, and everything with him was nothing but an absolute pleasure. Wepdiggy currently has 65 stories posted in over five different categories up on ff.net, and time has proven that the man can do anything. BUT, can he stay on subject when faced with an interview with Frea? Read on to find out. :)
Frea: So I'm here with Wepdiggy, and I have to admit, I'm a little nervous because here before me sits the King of Comedy in the fandom. I mean, if you hear a funny joke about a psychotic blond, it probably stemmed from this guy. I can only hope I'll keep up. Hiya, Wep!
Wepdiggy: Hiya Frea
Wepdiggy: And to be fair, I stole every joke I've ever written
Frea: Credit where credit's due?
Wepdiggy: Possession is 9/10th's of the law
Frea: You've been reading Laffy Taffy wrappers again?
Wepdiggy: I stick to Bazooka Joe
Wepdiggy: It's more my speed
Wepdiggy: Heh, well, you remember what I told you last week?
Wepdiggy: I think I've changed my mind.
Wepdiggy: It's the opposite now.
Frea: Okay, noted. No more martinis in this interview, got it.
Wepdiggy: Hold on, need to get my interview grub on
Wepdiggy: And by grub, I mean smokeless tobacco
Frea: I do love me a man with a Skoal Ring.
Wepdiggy: *sighs* Sure feels comfortable in there
Wepdiggy: When I was growing up, they sold fake snuff to kids
Wepdiggy: It was flavored like candy
Wepdiggy: It was the candy cigarette for rednecks
Frea: Wait, I think I had some of that when I used to live in the Carolinas. Came in a foil pocket, they called it Big League Chew?
Wepdiggy: Oh damn! I'd forgotten that
Wepdiggy: Yes, fake chew, too
Wepdiggy: But this was local made fake snuff
Frea: Oh, even better.
Wepdiggy: It was really waxy, but otherwise, it reacted like real dip
Wepdiggy: They train 'em to lose teeth early 'round these parts
Frea: And how does that affect your writing, do you think?
Wepdiggy: If I don't have it, it's more likely there will be a character death
Wepdiggy: Funny story... when I wrote Ashes of an American Flag? I was trying to quit.
Frea: Now, is that true? or are you just saying that so that fans will send you the good stuff to keep College Years Sarah alive?
Wepdiggy: That is absolutely true.
Wepdiggy: And they can bribe all they want, but College Years Sarah will of course fall fate to...
Wepdiggy: Well damn, don't want to spoil anything
Frea: Drat. So close!
Wepdiggy: But there may be a guillotine involved
Frea: Well, she does lose her head around Chuck a lot, so this'll be just like, what, a regular Wednesday at the office?
Wepdiggy: Jill will come through with might fist pumped with vengeance.
Frea: But wait a second, what about that thing we were talking about yesterday?
Wepdiggy: No, that was the other thing
Frea: The...thing with the...two-headed--ohhhhhh, okay. I gotcha.
Frea: Anyway, I've got to change the subject here for a minute, Wep. Since the point of the Scoop is to get to know the author a little better and maybe learn a few things about his or her stories along the way.
Wepdiggy: Right, of course, I understand.
Frea: Need to talk about a subject near and dear to my heart.
Wepdiggy: So you want to know my opinion on whether or not the US should continue to be a member of the UN?
Wepdiggy: And how that influences my writing?
Frea: Actually, I pay more attention to the EU than the UN, so that's way outside my wheelhouse. But maybe we should talk about a psycho killer instead
Frea: Anna Wu.
Wepdiggy: Of course you mean my Sarina stories, legendary kitty killers.
Frea: I think we're on different pages. Or in different books altogether?
Wepdiggy: So what else is new?
Wepdiggy: She has two hearts
Frea: Really? One on either side of her chest?
Wepdiggy: Sarah checked herself
Frea: Any of them belong to one Sir Morgan G. Grimes?
Wepdiggy: Of course not. He gave his heart to a Bartowski many years ago.
Wepdiggy: And of course I mean the little known Nellie Bartowski
Frea: So aside from the fact that Anna Wu has two hearts, why so much Wu love?
Wepdiggy: Well, it's much like mxpw's Carina fixation.
Wepdiggy: Anna's hot, and she's pretty much a blank slate.
Wepdiggy: And she has tons of potential that certain showrunners always chose to ignore.
Frea: (sorry, mx! I still love you!)
Wepdiggy: And I'm afraid of you
Wepdiggy: I mean I love you, too
Wepdiggy: In a completely hetero way
Frea: You're writing this epic Chuck Me Monday story in the POV of Anna, and she's not even in every episode. How hard does that make working on this story?
Wepdiggy: It can be difficult sometimes to find reasons why she's not there
Wepdiggy: But sometimes it's really nice not to be tied down by canon
Frea: My favorite chapter so far has probably been the simplest: a day off request form. The reason? Hatred of Tyler Martin.
Wepdiggy: Hah, yeah, that one kind of wrote itself
Wepdiggy: I pulled a personal day request form off Google and filled it out as Anna
Frea: And do you, personally, hate Tyler Martin, Wepdiggy?
Wepdiggy: I hate all people named Tyler
Wepdiggy: Well, I hate them because I fear them
Wepdiggy: It's ignorance on my part, I know, but I have a hard time overlooking the stereotypes
Frea: I'm going to ignore the obvious segue way present in stereotypes and ask about your long and sordid history with fanfic. I think you've written the most stories in the section?
Wepdiggy: Yes, I think I have
Wepdiggy: It's close between me and JMG, but I think I have him on the Chuck story front by a couple
Wepdiggy: Anyway, I don't know how or why I have so many
Wepdiggy: That count really crept up there on me
Wepdiggy: I think it's mostly because I have so many stories I want to tell, and no commitment to finishing anything
Frea: So you're flaky?
Wepdiggy: I'm sorry, I have to interrupt this interview to go outside and watch the stars...
Wepdiggy: No, really, I can flake out in a heartbeat
Wepdiggy: Wow, did you know Chuck and Morgan have a tobacco store Indian (Native American) in their apartment?
Frea: I was JUST talking to Aardie about that! He said he's seen it before, when Morgan moved in.
Wepdiggy: I will call him Kawliga
Frea: That's...slightly better than the name I picked for him...
Wepdiggy: Which is?
Frea: Canon Frank?
Wepdiggy: Ah, fair enough
Wepdiggy: That's what I like to call Daniel Shaw
Frea: *laughing* Frank may be a dummy, but he's not stupid.
Wepdiggy: And he has far more personality that Shaw could ever have
Frea: Frakkin' Word.
Frea: Okay, so back to you and your million stories.
Frea: So you don't have such a high story count because you secretly have a factory full of Oompah-Loompahs doing your bidding, correct?
Wepdiggy: That's an ugly rumor
Wepdiggy: Most of my work is done by out of work single mothers
Wepdiggy: And I give them a fair wage
Frea: And maternity leave?
Wepdiggy: What's that?
Frea: Guess that answers my question. Next topic!
Frea: How does it feel being the guy that created the Adorable Psycho?
Wepdiggy: I don't know, I'll have to ask Mx sometime
Wepdiggy: But no, seriously, he did create the name
Wepdiggy: I'm sure he's told you that once or twice
Frea: I may have not been listening.
Wepdiggy: But honestly, being the person that's tied to that franchise more than any other is a bit of a burden.
Wepdiggy: I mean, it's like no matter what else I write in the fandom, it all comes back to "You're the guy that makes Sarah kill at random."
Frea: Do you think that's going to affect your future projects?
Wepdiggy: I think it's affected every project I've worked on since January, at least
Wepdiggy: In more ways than one
Wepdiggy: First of all, sometimes it's hard to get out of "AP mode" to write a more canonically accurate Sarah
Wepdiggy: And secondly, people are always expecting me to go into "AP mode" in my other stories
Frea: Well, to be fair, Honeymooners did kind of present a version of "AP" to the world
Wepdiggy: I think she was closer to Banality Sarah, but I see your point
Wepdiggy: Want to know which Chuck author probably influenced the molding of AP Sarah more than anyone?
Wepdiggy: Of course
Wepdiggy: And Billatwork
Wepdiggy: No, really it was ersk4
Wepdiggy: His Sarah HATES brunettes
Wepdiggy: And says as much many times over
Wepdiggy: AP Sarah was initially a tongue-in-cheek take off on his Sarah, and Sarah's like her
Frea: Does his Sarah also have a propensity toward approaching brunettes with anything from a hand grenade to a hacksaw?
Wepdiggy: She doesn't, but it's made pretty clear that she wouldn't mind doing so
Frea: It can be therapeutic.
Frea: I'm not going to make the obvious joke here. Sorry.
Wepdiggy: Damn, and I set it up so well
Frea: I know. The banana peel was so well-placed
Wepdiggy: You should have driven the car right into the Big Yellow Joint
Frea: Clearly, though, people love the Adorable Psycho (tm mxpw). Got any plans for her future?
Wepdiggy: Actually, awhile back, mx and I planned out the entire future (and past) for AP Sarah
Wepdiggy: Unfortunately, unless Mx finishes his AP story, the rest of the saga is in a standstill
Wepdiggy: But I did hear a rumor that ne71 may be working on another AP tale
Frea: Damn. That makes me feel bad that I stole him for Bank Job.
Wepdiggy: And now I'm pressuring him to write Chuck vs the Wingman
Wepdiggy: I don't feel bad about it, though
Frea: Any fascinating tidbits about this history or future you're willing to share?
Wepdiggy: Sarah's mother is involved
Wepdiggy: And her children
Wepdiggy: And genetics
Frea: Children? Multiple?
Wepdiggy: Pffft, this is AP Sarah. You really think Chuck will only make the mistake of impregnating her once?
Frea: He does realize that he's risking apocalypse each time, right?
Wepdiggy: I'm sure he does, but as was shown in Nomination, Chuck is on the verge of being broken by AP
Wepdiggy: She's bending him to her will
Frea: There are worse fates to be had, I suppose.
Wepdiggy: Like for instance Casey in the AP series
Frea: Oh man! I always feel so terrible for him!
Wepdiggy: His perpetual state of annoyance with AP is one of my favorite parts to write in the series.
Frea: Poor Casey. Having to break Disney security, a knife to the ass, cleaning brunettes out of the Vic's grille....
Wepdiggy: Giving Chuck a sex-ed lesson...
Wepdiggy: Most people forget that's how the very first AP story started
Frea: In another year or so, there may have to be a remake of the AP origin story. Isn't that the way Hollywood works?
Wepdiggy: Or so I've heard
Wepdiggy: We may just do a new shinier version of the original
Wepdiggy: With CGI dinosaurs
Frea: You just remix the theme, add whichever rapper is making a comeback at the moment, and bam, instant success
Wepdiggy: And of course, I may put Jabba back into the original story
Frea: Yes. Much to the happiness/distress of die-hard fans.
Frea: Now, I wanna switch gears again.
Frea: Remember that thing we were talking about?
Wepdiggy: With the, you know...?
Frea: No, the other one. The thing where you took Fates and you kind of...oh, hell, I'll just ask you outright. Got anything interesting for fans in the near future?
Wepdiggy: Oh! That?
Frea: Let 'er rip.
Wepdiggy: Okay, so there's this story, and for lack of a better title, we'll call it Chuck vs the Prison Break
Wepdiggy: It takes off from canon about 10 minutes into the pilot
Frea: In which Sara gets brutalized on a regular basis, is an addict, loses her dad to a conspiracy, is tortured, and then imprisoned?
Frea: ...oh, wait, wrong Sara. We're talking SaraH Walker, not Sara Tancredi.
Wepdiggy: Heh, right.
Wepdiggy: We need to be clear on that.
Wepdiggy: So I should go with Chuck vs Three Days Later?
Frea: Yes. Especially since Sara is played by a Sarah.
Frea: That works! Anyway, pilot, ten minutes in?
Wepdiggy: Okay, so somehow, Chuck and Sarah both get arrested for their involvement in the stealing of the Intersect, and they end up in neighboring cells
Wepdiggy: Then through a series of events, there will be action, adventure, romance, jokes, and Bryce
Frea: Bryce? Really?
Wepdiggy: Until he takes his energy mask off, at least
Wepdiggy: Then it turns out he's really Odie
Wepdiggy: And Garfield comes in and kills him
Frea: ...Wep, do you have a confession you want to make?
Frea: Are you Shakespeare Hemmingway?
Wepdiggy: Just Shakespeare
Wepdiggy: My writing partner Brickroad16 is Hemmingway
Frea: I can definitely see it. The flair is there.
Wepdiggy: And the song lyrics
Wepdiggy: Oh! I have another fic I'm working on I can talk about, if you want.
Frea: Ooh! Let's hear it!
Wepdiggy: It's called SaVe Ya Later
Wepdiggy: Sa=Sarah, Ve=Veronica Mars
Wepdiggy: And it promises to be a smashing good time for all.
Frea: It sounds like a masterpiece
Wepdiggy: They're locked in a safehouse together
Wepdiggy: And of course...
Wepdiggy: They'll braid one another's hair, talk about boys, have pillow fights
Frea: Of course. I can see Veronica Mars doing all of that.
Wepdiggy: And that actually should be published before this interview airs
Wepdiggy: She's very girly, that Veronica
Wepdiggy: And Sarah Walker is the ultimate girly girl, as we know
Frea: Uh-huh. I don't know, I've never written her as girly. Like, ever.
Wepdiggy: Wait, I had something for this...
Frea: *twiddles thumbs*
Wepdiggy: And it's gone
Frea: The grain alcohol getting to you again?
Wepdiggy: I blame the South Carolina Public School system
Frea: Guess that means I should probably ask my wrap-up questions.
Frea: Oh, crap, this means actually having wrap-up questions.
Wepdiggy: Oh wait!
Wepdiggy: Are we going to do this rapid fire?
Frea: Why not?
Frea: Coke or Pepsi?
Frea: Boxers or briefs?
Frea: Batman or Superman?
Wepdiggy: Wait...which Batman?
Frea: Dealer's choice
Wepdiggy: Hmm, so I'm going Adam West Batman
Frea: Holy mayoral candidate Batman?
Wepdiggy: That's the one
Frea: Clemson or SC?
Wepdiggy: Which do I want to fall off the face of the Earth? Clemson.
Frea: Intersect 1 or 2?
Wepdiggy: Did I win the prize?
Wepdiggy: Frakkin right!
Wepdiggy: It wasn't the washer/dryer set was it?
Frea: Um, the Pinto.
Frea: All right, I think that's a wrap. Say good night, Gracie!
Wepdiggy: Wait, I want Gracie to stay for a night cap, she sounds hot.
Frea: Sounds good to me. I'd better go write Fates.